Okay, I'd begun putting words together for my book... 'To My Unborn Kids', I just felt I should share these excerpt with you....
Someone stereotyped is worse than someone insane because the mad man over there is acting under the influence of mind loss, a stereotype has his mind intact, his brain functioning, yet agrees to despicable things, fights with his life to uphold it, and all the while they don't know the why for the action, how it began, why it is done, why it should or not be. These brainwashed fellows can go as far as lynching someone for not following that which they do, even if they don't know the why...... Before something becomes a universal definition, it must undergo thorough scrutiny before acceptance, but the norms of stereotypes cannot be scrutinized, they make no room for it, and fights who ever dares to. Only cowards do what others does without getting to know why it is done, and you my dear kids are no coward. Your actions should be borne out of a knowing of something, not because others are doing it, not because it is generally acceoted.
Scrutinize every information and conduct pattern you come across and don't accept any on the basis of 'our people does it'. For example, if you as a boy is deeply hurt and break into tears, someone will say "you're a man, men don't cry, stop crying like a female." Instead of you to bottle up the emotion and try to act 'manly', ask they why men do not cry. Are men not humans? When did emotion became assigned to a particular gender? And if all there reply is "because men don't cry,' get a chair and cry some more!! There's a common denominator of all stereotypes, they hate being questioned, and this is because they really have no answer to give, and it is because there's no answer to it really. All humans have emotions, it's part of the human soul, the human soul is made up of the will, mind, emotions and imagination so emotion is part of all humans and thus expressing emotions isn't feminine, it is human. I cry, yes I do, and I am no less a man, if something moves you to cry, Cry! It shows you are human........
This also applies to a little girl who says things like 'when I grow up, I'll like to be a president, pilot,' or whatever beautiful thing they so aspire. Somebody will come along to say, 'so when are you getting married? Men are not comfortable with 'made'women. Trying to sell the idea that a woman should live all her life aspiring to marry, and only when she is a Mrs is she fulfilled. This is a lie, a big lie, a big fat disgusting lie. Imaginations aren't masculine, a woman has imaginative ability and should use it, and the will is also a component of the human soul, it's there for decision making. Use your imagination dear daughter, dream about that which you so want to be and marry only when you decide to. Marriage isn't an achievement, it is partnership. You will have nothing to do with anybody who tries to make you less of who you are. And if you decide not to get married, it's your decision all the same. You have a right to decide and none of it should be shamed. Marriage isn't what you were born for, I'm raising you to be independent, with your dreams and achievements in making notable significant attainment and not just to be married. Relationship will work if your spouse and by this I mean your male spouse will give his own commitment. It is not what you are designed to do alone. A marriage failure isn't a woman failure and keeping a home is not the responsibility of the feminine gender. So dream, aspire, imagine and become them. All the dreams of your hearts should be pursued, drop the one you feel you really do not want anymore, drop it because you feel you don't want it, not because of a man, not because of marriage. It will be a thing of shame to aspire to 'enter-house' - a Nigerian women adage for getting married - when you had equal opportunity as the male. All through school, you have male classmates none of them is aspiring to be married, they aspire to become more and so should you. Don't hurriedly accept a proposal because your ripe age is waning, accept because you see that your spouse believes in you, not intimidated by you and isn't uncomfortable with your progress. You're no man's cook, all living things feeds, and if all humans feeds, they should know how to make their own meals.......
IT'S ME
CHINES ZOE!
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